Thursday, November 4, 2010

You say Child I say Adult

OK, I know that I've been gone, and seriously, noone would be devastated if I won't post any more journals of my life, but I MADE this blog to write down all my little memories, which I'll forget in days, and whenver I read back my blog I find out how I forget pretty much about everything, and that's what was my point when I decided to write a blog. 
In summer I was way too lazy to even think about sitting down and write something, not to mention that my summer wasn't that eventful, so I nearly had nothing to write about.....And as school started I have NO free time, because there is sooo much work to do. I have to get my english language exam which will be in May, and I always find out that I know NOTHING! I'm scared to death, but I just want to prove that I can do it, that I am not a child anymore, in spite of everybody treats me like one. I know that I am the youngest in the family, I am the little girl, but I'll be 17 next year, and I think I'm pretty matured to my age. I want them to trust me more, and to consider my ideas, and opinions, not just reject it all the time, saying "What does this girl know? She's just a baby.". I'm so fed up with people taking care of me so much, because I can solve my problems, I can live on my own, but they don't let me. I want to believe, that passing my exams will be a great chance to show them that I don't need so much guidance. This is something that I did on my own since I can remember. I learnt English since I was a little girl, and they couldn't help me because they didn't learn english, just russian, and german. So right now nothing is more important than studying.
I also want to make sure that I'll be able to study in a good university, when I graduate, and I have to learn and learn and just learn to reach this too. I have my own dreams, but I have no idea how to make them come true yet. 
So the whole point of this post is that I try to keep up and do the posts because I love to remeber. For now, I'm going to get ready to go out and watch Paranormal Activity 2 during my Oh-so-wanted autumn break. :)


PS.: I know that I told you that I'm looking for the pefect dress to that wedding. Well it turned out that we found the perfect ones, but on the day of the wedding I got sick! :/ I had to be there feeling like a big amount of crap. But everyone adored the dresses. :) ;) Of course I had the pink dress. :)

Friday, August 6, 2010

Amusement park experiences

I have to say that I feel extremely tired today. In fact I went to sleep today which means that I got home super late this night, cause you might know from my latest post that me, my sister and some other friends went to the amusement park for the nightime. YES! It started last year at my place, and they decided to continue it this year too, because of the high popularity. We went there at around 7pm and I think that I was so over the moon and I acted like a little girl again who weared her mother's high heel for the first time. I was way too cheerful. We started off with some funny things like Mirror World where I was smart enough to go into one or two mirrors while I was trying to find the way out. My friends were laughing so hard at me cause they taught it was funny....:) Then we just tried out the roller coaster which was scary for me just because as we were rolling down it lookes like each time that I'm gonna hit the boards with my head cause there were some above us. So everytime I was screaming and I closed my eyes so tightly and then I realised that I didn't hit it. :)
And from then the rough things started....just like Top Scan which is this: And thank god I haven't tried it out. My sister and a friend were brave enough, and when it started I barely could whatch it. It was spinning, and moving crazily in every way, and when they got off the ride, my sister was like, no way I'm gonna sit in this again in my entire life, which was weird from her, so I had a little suspicion how was it like. Then we went to the Drop Tower which was really amusing. It went up sooooooo high and then it just dropped us. That felt was sooooo bad. It was like when I dream that I am diving, but it didn't end. It brought us up to 12 floor height, and I have to say that the sight was amazing. Then we just tried out Ikarus which wasn't a big deal, but it was high too. We tried out some other things too, but these were the most important ones which I wanted to mention. And there's one more too....My absolute favourite one was Breakdance. I LOVE it. We were on it like 3 or 4 times and the first time I didn't want to open my eyes, but then doing the last ones I was moving with the dance. It was fun. But which was not fun at all, that after the last breakdance ride I felt like I'm gonna throw up. Gosh! It was sooo bad. I didn't even eat after like 3pm to make sure that nothing's gonna happen. But I was starving when I left home so maybe that was the reason, so I just relaxed, drank a little water, and I felt fine. We left the park a bit before midnight and we decided to go and eat at McDonald's, to make my starving stomach feel right. I was okay for a few minutes after we ate, but when we were leaving to go home, the throw up feeling came back. Gosh it was soooooooo bad. When I got home I didn't even showered. I washed my face and my teeth and went straightly to my bed, and I immediately fall assleep. But for my luck, at 8 am a thunderstorm just woke me up. So now I am suffering from the tiredness and from the hurt which left in my arms, and in my left from the yesterday's fun. But it worth it I think. 
And also. I wanted it to tell lastly. I drived for the first time yesterday. I mean it was just a Gokart but it felt sooooo amazing. I want to drive so badlyyyyyyy! I mean I was the slowest, but I didn't care about it. It was just sooooo much fun. 
Now I'm going cause I have to do some other things too, but I'll post some pictures for you guys!


Wednesday, August 4, 2010

The skipped two months in one post

It's unbelievable, but it had happened! I have skipped two months straight! I haven't even posted a word or something like "Hey I'm still alive, and didn't lost in the ocean" in turn I haven't even been to any beaches lately. I think I can't really give you any kind of explanation, and I won't plade any excuses for that, I'm just gonna tell you the big secret of my two-month-long silence. I WAS SOOOOO LAZY! I just could't make myslef to write a simple thing there. It's weird for me cause I really love writing my blog, this place gives me peace where I can share my most secretive thoughts that I would rather think twice who I share them with. So now looking back I think I was such an idiot not writing what happened with me in the middle of my summer just to have my memories which I have alredy forgot I think, but to be honest there's nothing much going on with me lately. I'm mostly at home since I got home from a vacation last Wednesday. There were only friends and me at a river, and we spent six days together, and thanks for our luck, from six days it was raining through five days. So we couldn't really go to any beaches, or we couldn't just hanging around and tanning. We mostly sat in the house doing silly things, like pillowfighting and even the guys actually. It was way too funny, I even escaped from a locked room through an open window, straightly down to the muddy ground in my pink, fuzzy socks. And on our last day we decided to go to a local bowling center, where we evoked all the old memories we had together, and added an another special afternoon to that list. Of course in the last days I was extremely homesick, which now I really regret, cause I should had really enjoy the time which had left for us, but all I could think of is my own bed, my lovely sisters, my mom, and all the things I missed through a week. It was so relaxing arriving to my home, and be a bit away from my mostly adored friends. But I'm pretty in one thing - I will never ever forget these six days down there.
Since then I went shopping with my sisters like two times, and we did a little sister day too, actually I took them to play bowling, cause they never really played it, and I thought that it would be fun. Aaaaaaaand I was right. We had a really great time, and after the game we just went shopping in the mall, and bought some things, while we tried on a lot of crazy outfits. We went home at around 9pm and we ordered pizza, and stuffs like that. Our parents weren't at home so we allowed a little a fun to ourselves, cause in fact we never really have that much time for each other. We are always running around, going everywhere, but now in this month we have some extra special time to spent together, so we even settled that we are going to the local fun-fair tomorrow evening. And I am excited cause WE HAVE NEVER BEEN to the fun-fair together. That's crazy. I mean we are actually now, I allow myself to say, grown-ups and we haven't been to there together. 
But yeah lately I am at home, cause my friends are all over the country. They are not at home, so we can't make any programs together, or just hang out somewhere. But I am not sad. I'm relaxing, and just thinking, and thinking cause we have an upcoming event in a few weeks. We have to attend to my cousin's wedding, and me and me oldest sister have to find the perfect dress, the shoes, the bag, the accesories, so everything. I think I have 3 weeks to do all these.
But I'm looking forward to some more fun too! Me and my parents and hopefully one of sisters or my friends will go to Lake Balaton which is a beautiful place in Hungary, and we are planning to stay there a week. There is a pretty cool beach, and a huge market too, where we can get a lot of crazy things. and probably we'll go to beaches for one days like a trip too, but which I'm the most excited about is the one week long vacation. Yaaaaaaaay! 
So stay tuned cause I'm back, and I'll keep doing blogging like I did before! Have a nice day!


Oh and please tell me what you think of this eye look! I made if just for fun, but I wanna hear your opinions.

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Driving licence, vacation, Miley....

It's kinda surprising for me to do a blog post at this time, which is for me means NIGHT, but I thought that this is a Saturday evening, and why would I go to sleep at 10pm already, and what time is better to do a blog post than a saturday night, cuddlep up in my bed, showered. Well, that's why I'm here. Today I went to my local grocery store and I bought some stuffs for my upcoming vacation with my class, starts at Thursday, next week. I just bought some random things, but I found out something which makes me wanna scream in my happiness.
My daddy told me on the way going home, that if I do have a licence I can drive no matter how old I am. I have to get some papers from my doctor that I normal, and stuffs, but it makes me so happy, cause I thought that I will be travelling with the buses and trams for the rest of my life, but now I have the hope's tiny light. This september I want to do all the paper thigs for my licence and I hope that around next year I'll be able to sit in a car. And drive!!! Yaaay! I can't wait. Cause you know in Europe you're not allowed to drive until you're not 18, but you can get your licence when you turn 16. I just thought taht it makes no sense if I do my licence but I can't sit into a car, or anything, and I just forget it anyways. But that makes me so happy. Thank you dad for letting me know. I don't know why he didn't mentioned this to me earlier, but I don't even care about this now.
Right now I am watcing a live streaming from portugal and waiting for Miley Cyrus to perform. I just got the link for it. So I think I'm going now, this blog post is already pointless, so Good night!


Wednesday, May 26, 2010

A rarely used ability

OMG! I am so sorry that I've been gone for a whole week, but the last few days were really crazy for me. And of course I was really lazy, doing some blog posts, but most of the time I was doing errands, went shopping, met with friends, tried my bicycle after 6 years, visited my once-upon-home, went on a trip to the palace of magics, and etc. 
We had a long weekend, because of the feast we have here, and I don't know where else, but we did not have school, and work and such things like that on monday, so I was able to relax a bit. I had to sleep after all what happened to me the weekend. On friday I tried biking after 6 years, and I have to say it did not went good. I mean I can ride my bicycle but my dad was waiting for me, he wanted to go around the town, I just went outside to try for a minute, and I couldn't go in a straight line. He was absolute out of himself. I had to listen to him while he was literally humbling me, cause I wasn't able to do a circle or whatever he wanted me to do. It ended up crying in my room, and being mad at him for days. But the next day was just even more interesting, cause we were able to biking around the school and everywhere with some of my classmates, and I was so happy, that we are doing this on a beautiful, sunny day, and I realised that my father had gone from home. And of course he took the key for the garage, where my bike was. So I did not go cycling, thanks dad! I was still mad at him because of the friday, and on saturday I thought I am going to explode. I was soooooo mad, that I haven't been like this a while ago. 
Finally I comforted myself with a little shopping in the mall, and I bought some goodies, including a pale pair of jeans, an oversized black shirt, and a pair of earrings. I went with my sisters, so it was even better, but I felt sorry for what happened afternoon. On saturday evening we did a little trip with my sister to the countryside, to get my her cycle home, but we didn't have the chance to go and try it out, cause I helped her wash her car, which took our afternoon. But on monday morning we went on a bicycle trip, and we biked for almost 3 hours, and we visited our elementary school, and the house where we grown up. When we arrived home, we were starving, and ordered pizza (yes, again :)) and when we couldn't move from the repletion, my sister started making pancakes. So, you can imagine how much I ate that day. And to be honest, I am just gaining, and gaining.....but it only shows on my stomach. :S 
Last but least, my yesterday was good. I had only five classes and we went to the palace of magics, where we took some funny pictures, and had fun. And even today we had four classes, so I am really pleased. And what's going on here with me? The storms became an every day thingv here, so I am not really get frightened, when suddenly the sun hides, everything gets dark, and it starts thundering, and the wind starts to blow. Then it all gone after ten minutes and the air is so much better. I can't wait for the summer holiday, and I feel very pissed when I think about that some schools are over. Mine lasts for June 16th. My summer starts at June 17th. Pray for me! :)


PS.: picture is a rainbow from yesterday's strom!

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Terrible weather, dentists, musicians

Right now I am cuddled up to my pillow in my warm bed, cause that was all I was waiting for all day long. I need warmth! I need some suneshine to get back some color in my face. I look like a pale, and dry one-week-old piece of something. I feel  like I'm missing too much D vitamins, and get a little bit more hydration by the 2 weeks lasted raining. The weather here is like it was in February. It's cold, rainy and windy. People are walking around in heavy, winter jackets, scarves, and boots. In MAY! Come one! I am so sad, and depressed! I need to see somesunshine, and I want to wake up for the sun shining through my window in the morning, not for the frantic wind blowing the trees, and shaking my windows in the middle of the night. That's crazy! I hope this summer won't be like this at all. 
Today was also a freezing day and when I thought that it's over I had to go with Merci to the dentist, because she is very afraid of them, so I was kinda dangling her, by sitting with her in the waiting area, holding her hands, or just making her comfortbale in that stupid room where the walls has white tiles all over, and has that nauseous, but signature scent. As we entered the building it was all over in the air. And she was just even more nervous. She was that much nervous that she almost cried. I saw her eyes get watery. And don't get me wrong. It wasn't a simple checking, cause her tooth broke in half. She had to go and fix it, but the doctor, who is a comlite idiot, did not do it for her, cause I think she was way too lazy to move her ass. So she relived a bit, but she knows that he has to go somewhere else. 
The way back home was also freezing, and I almost fall asleep on the tram. I might get a little cold, I think, but I hope it will gone for next Thursday which is the first day of our hoilday with the class. Oh, I didn't even mentioned why I think I get cold. As we were searching for the dentist's (cause we didn't know where it was) we walked for a good 30 minutes I think, cause we somehow walked in the same street all over again. We even asked a few people and none of them could tell us where to find it. I was freezing, I was tired, Merci was nervous and she was making me mad after an hour listening of her snivel about the same thing. So I was a bit stressed when a guy showed us where to go, and as we were making our way to the clinic, we met with our music teacher. She is living here near the clinic. She was kinda surprised seeing us. 
Now I think I'm going to have a shower, cause I am freezing. Good night!


Monday, May 17, 2010

Two birthday parties at one day

Hello there! I am back from a Monday school day which was pretty exhausting, and when I finally got home at 3pm I went out with my parents to a department store to buy some stuffs to my holiday with my class which will be next week's Thursday until Sunday. We are going to biking all 4 days long. I don't know how I will survive it, but I am sure that I have to collect all my streight to make it. 
I am still pretty tired after my birthday party which was on Saturday. There was even two. First with my family. Everyone were out, expect my mom, so I had time in the morning to make myself ready to everything. I washed my hair, showered, did my make-up...etc. We ordered a huge pizza for lunch and everyone arrived (mean: my sisters, sister's boydfriends, dad) and we just started eating, talking, and joking around. It was a really good, and calmed lunch. After all we could not move because of the lots of food, but my cake was waiting for us. I got a Sachertorte cause it's my favourite thing ever. I had the pink (or purple) elephant on it form Pooh and two pink candles showing 16. It was adorable. So we ate a little cake, then I got my presents. The big present was a camera, which I was asking for. It's pink and sooooooooooo cute! I had an oppurtinty to try it out at the party, and it's amazing. So I was waaaaay too happy. But when I first opened it, I thought that it's black because on the box there was a black one. But nevermind! I am sooo happy. I also got a memory card, and a pink camera bag. And a pair of earrings which symbols a kitty. So cuuuutteee! Again! 
At 5 I made my way to Merci's house to join to my party. You might know that I was sooo afraid that there will be only 3 people including me, I was nervous all day long, in the end, I thought I stay at home, but then I just made myself to go. When I arrived all of my closest friedns were running down the stairs, and I almost cryed. It was the cutest thing they ever did to me. When I got out of the shock of the surprise we started the party with karaoke, megastar, dinner, my second cake which was dobos torte (a famous hungarian cake) and just funny things. It was a really good night but next time I will recommend them not to do a plus sleep over cause we were all exhausted and it turned out that everyone wanted to be in their own bed, sleeping. And so what I got? I got a pillow with everyone on it, a book calles Mixed Doubles by Jill Mansell, a bracelet, a pair of earring, a jewelery holder, which is a doll, and it has a ruffled pink dress, and look amazing. I also got a bunch of chocolate, and just some other cute things which I can't remember. It was a really good day, and I am so pleased they did thid for me. So Thank you guys again! 


Friday, May 14, 2010

My birthday's excitement

OMG! Tomorrow is my birthday! I've been waiting for this day sooo badly, in the last couple weeks, and I am soooo excited, even if it only means that I am a year older. And I don't really now why am I so keyed up, maybe it's about the happiness when you open your beautifully wrapped presents, and find out that you got what you truly wanted, or the perfect birthday cake with the exact amount of candles burning depended on your age, and all the people around you want you to wish something and blew the candles. Or maybe that's just because this day is going to be all about me. They ask ME what I want to eat, they wish ME a happy, and special birthday, and just blah blah blah...I mean I have two sisters and we kinda always had to share and decide somehow. We always had to deal, and fix things between us. And now I don't have to worry about this.
But to be honest, I have a little bit of depressed feeling too. As I mentioned my friends served me a party which is tomorrow night, and today like all of my friends told me that they are sorry but they can't come. So there will be me, Merci and and another friend, who I don't like at all. That's not gonna be an interesthing party, I have to say, and I wouldn't go, if Merci did not tell me today that she already ordered a tiered cake. I was shocked. I told her to bake me something, not choosing the pattern, the colors and everything seperately. And now there will be 3 people. WOW! And to be honest, this whole week, I was waiting for this party sooo much, cause all of my friends were invited, and  I thought that we will have good saturday evening, but now I don't EVEN want to go. All I want is to stay at home with my family. I know it sounds stupid but now, I lost all of my cheerfulness cause there will be only one person who is really my friend and this person is Merci. We all hate the other girl, I don't even know why was she invited, but who cares now. It will be even worse. And I can't do that I am not going to the party, because it would be unfairness to Merci. So I'll have to suffer an evening and a night with these two people, and it will be BORING!
When I told Merci that we should take the party to next week, she was a bit pisse but she said that It's my decision, but I didn not want to hurt her. Now she is always asking like "Are you really sure you're coming?" and just stuffs like that.Well I don't know, I hope that it won't ruin my whole bday.


Thursday, May 13, 2010

Do we really have to say goodbye so early?

I just got home from a meeting at school. We had kinda an evening with the parents, and the students and we talked about all the stuffs we had to kinda analyse a bit. It was just my class. We had so much fun arranging all the tables and chairs, putting all the colored, plastic cups on the tables, and all the sweets perfectly together of course in the cutest ways. We watched our spinning video together, and joked around with my classmates all evening, and I felt over the moon. 
Of course, how it's used to be, my happiness did not last for long. Just a few parents stayed at the school, along with me, Merci, and two other friends. And this is also important that I've heard a really sad thing about my "english fairy"! She is deciding leaving the school, and leaving US! I was so upset but I did not cry or anything. I just accepted it! She chose the worst school ever, cause all the teachers are old, and the most important, that they are old-fashioned. My favourite teacher of the world is just so fresh, and acting and thinking young, and in a true, real aspect. She is always right, has the best and cutest ideas, and always laughing at something like a little girl. But the other teachers look at her like a fool, and never, ever admit her as a person there. They act with her like she is the last offender in the world, because she is not a sour, old lady, who doesn't like children. And now this evening, when we were standind there with just these few people, she told it to the parents, and some of classmates, cause we were the only one who knew it, and I was trying so hard holding back my tears, but when I looked at Merci, and I saw she was crying, and all her face is covered with tears, I couldn't hold them back any longer. We just hugged each other and cryed. They tried to comfort us, but it did not last for long. When we said our goodbyes for this day, she was driving in front of us, and I saw a tear on her cheek. It was so heart-smothering, and we were crying all the way to our home. Still now, sometimes it's difficult to type, causeI can't see much from my tears. I know that she hasn't even decided it yet, but even thinking of makes me sick. This evening started good, but it turned out sooo emotional, and ti became a disaster. Now I'm going to sleep cause my eyes are red and puffy!


Tuesday, May 11, 2010

A gift giving fairy from England

Gosh! Today was just so much fun for me. In the morning as Me and Merci were waiting for the bus to come, my english teacher (and our friend) picked us up, and just drove us to school, because she saw us satnding there and she thought that it would be generous not letting us waiting. Actually she just got home from England, and as we arrived to school, she did not let us go until she did not give presents for us. She was soooo sweet, because she knows that we can't really giving it back to her, cause I can't just fly to London and shop her a bunch of cute things, leaving behind my school, and just stuffs like that. So she was really sweet!! She bought us pretty much the same things, some cute things from River Island, I don't know who knows this, and I got a flamingo patterned flip flop, which looks hilarious. We also got some sweets, but during some pretty exhausting classes we ate them. It was a really good day for me, and as I just look through my week, the what's-gonna-happen-this-week part, well I'm getting more excited in every second, thinking about my birthday with my family and my friends. Oh yeah! Well that's a big thing which really bothers me. It's so cruel not knowing what they are planning. They even go out of the classroom without me to discuss the party plans, and I just feel sooo curious and sad at the same time. Tomorrow they are going shopping, and I am not allowed to go!!!!! I was like what? It's ok that they have no idea what the hell they should buy me, but come on! They could really buy me a simple thing, and if we are here, I don't really care about the presents. If they don't give me any, well that's it. Which means a lot to me is that they want to celebrate it with me, and that's what matters.
We went shopping on Sunday as I mentioned, and I bought my party outfit. I just found a cute pink top with no back and no pants, and it has a bunch of ruffles on it. I'll post a picture later when we are partying. 
And now as my teacher was in England, I think learning in England would be such an amazing thing, and OMG! I'll be shopping and walking in the cities all the time, and just spend a lot of money. I want to live there for my college years, and I know that I will miss my family sooooooooooooooooo much, I can't even write it down how much, but I know that they are supporting me, and they all told me to do it, no matter what. I think it's my chance to move my life somewhere. Plus, my parents will be super proud at me! :D


Sunday, May 9, 2010

The naughty birthday present

I've just woke up half an hour ago, and finally I could sleep 11 hours without waking up at my usual 6 am. It felt amazing, and I just love when I can sleep in.
Yestreday I met up with a few of my girlfirends, and I have to say that this was just an amazing afternoon. We started off with caramel cookies, then cheesy chips, salty chips, while drinking Ice tea in big portions, then party mixed sweets, then cheesy and onion chips, and then the last we could eat was a huge ice cream. We were laughing so hard all afternoon, escepially on the lots of food we ate. We were joking around, and I went home in the best mood I've had this week. When I got home, my parents arrived too, because they were out of twon for the day, cause they were celebrating their wedding anniversary, and they just ran out of the big city, to a small, romantic one, where they had lunch together, and walked for hours. I even got a suvenir, which is a beautiful porcelain spoon with the city's name on it. And we got other things too, like food, but the spoon was kinda outshinig, so I just mentioned it. Then the evening was quite funny too, cause we watched megastar, which is the same like american idol, but it's hungarian, and it's sooooo funny cause they are showing the auditions for the first 2-3 episodes. I laughed my heart out, cause the people who go there have no rationality about themselves.
When I was showering an important thing hit my mind, and I knew that I have to talk with my mom about that, so I quickly finished the best part about my evenings, and rushed to the kitchen in only a towel wrapped around me, and I saw my mom, my dad, and my sister doing something with a box, and when they saw me, they started yelling at me, that they thought I was showering. I said I was, but I need to to talk with moml, and stuffs like that, and this whole scene made sense for me when they started to hide the box from me, and just shut it to my mom's dresser. It was my birthday present. Gosh! I almost saw my present!! I was shcoked. I even told them how can they be so loose watching my presents when I can see it anytime if I rush to the kitchen just like I did. Gosh!
And now I am reading Rebel Angels by Libba Bray, the author of The incredible beauty, which was amazing and Rebel angels is the second book. It's great. But now I have to learn, cause I'll have a few exams next week, and later the afternoon we'll go out shopping.


Thursday, May 6, 2010

The rainstorm-liking girl

Gosh! Researching people in the net is not always a good idea. I don't know what's true and what is not, but I am kinda freaked out, and I don't want to believe in these things, but still something tells me inside that this is logical, no matter how badly I fight for the opposite thing. I am talking about a person that I used to really love, and now I just don't know what to feel. I read quite bad things about this person, and the look of this someone is not matching with the article, but I still think that a bit of the "truth" (that's how they call it in the article) is true. I just don't think a look-like-a-really-sweet-person-even-if-I-just-look-at-him/her type of personality can do bad things like that. Ok, let's be clear, I don't know this person personally, but what I've heard and saw, my opinion is still the same, what I wrote down a line over. So, don't be jealous people! Don't be!
Yesterday evening there was a huge storm here, and to be honest, we could all feel it all day long, because all day we had no air, and we were all walking around in tank tops, but the sun wasn't even shining. So yesterday was quite hot, and steamy. When I saw the thunders and the black clouds above us,I ran outside, and I was waiting for the rainstorm. I have to say, I did not have to wait for too long, cause after a minute the raindrops started falling faster and faster by every second, and after an another minute it was raining heavily, giving the most amazing scent to me that I could ever smelled. I was standind by our window outside, and as the rain was pouring, the wind also started to blow crazily, and it blow the water straight to my face, then to my clothes, and I looked like a mad person with my curled-by-the-rain hair, and in my wet clothes cleaved to my body. I enjoyed the rain, and the smell of the fresh air, and also how madly the wind blowed my hair, and mixed it with the rain. I love storms. OMG! I just love the heavy rains in the summer. When I was a child I used to be afraid, and hide in the car, if we were somewhere, and now I really did regreted it. I love to jumping and dancing around freely in the rain, like cavemens danced when they wanted to bring or dismiss rain. I want to shout out how happy I am these times, and I could have the chance. We used to go to lakes a lots of time, because my dad is a big angler, and we always escorted him. There was nothing jus the lake, soem reed fibers, and a giant corn field. There I could shout and dance. But I just hid in the car. Gosh! :)
Today nothing special happened, I just had a little extra free time, which felt sooo good. I am kinda confused how to do the next Saturday, cause it will be my bday, and my friends decided to do me a bday party, as I mentione before, but it turned out that we will celebrate it with my family in the same day, so I am thinking about switching the dates somehow, but I don't want to piss off my friends, cause you know, they just setted it for me, and I changing dates, but I hope, I'll fix it. 

Monday, May 3, 2010

A one-off, and life changing chance

We just finally reached my favourite month of the year! I've been whining about the three-weeks-long-rain, the huge snow, the cold weather, and just many things I hate about winter, but now I can go out in a t-shirt and in ballerina shoes. How cool is that? It's May!!!
I know I told you before that this is my favourite month, and the reason is a bit complex. This is the month of my birthday, and I think it's kinda goes back to my childhood, when I was waiting for my presents in the rising sun, and it was always a good memorie for me. Now, I just love the whole month, my birthday, and everything. This year I asked for a camera, which is just mine, cause there are always a lots of arguments about the one we have now. So I hope I'll get my pink one. Today I also got to know that my lovely friends are really planning me a bday party, which is a sleepover too. It's my birthday, on the 15th of May, Saturday. I hope it will be a really good day, and I will be able to enjoy the party with my firends in the evening. 
Also! Yesterday we went out with my sisters, to pierce our ears again, but this time, I pierced a pair, one in my left, and one, in my right ears. Now I have 3 holes in my left ear, and 2 in my right. I just love it, but that's all. I won't get anymore. I just decided it this night, when I wasn't able to sleep much, because my ears were hurting, and I barely could sleep in my sides. That was horrible. And it's still hurts, when I touch it, or something. But I survived the very first one in January, so I think nothing will be wrong. 
Today we did not have  lot of school, and that means that tha senoir classes are graduating, and we had school in the afternoon, and it's going to be the same the next two days too. I am happy, cause I can sleep as long as I want to, and then I have hours to make myself ready for school. 
There is also a thing which is making me sad and excited in the same time. A friend of mine, told me that me and Merci can go to England to study in a university, when we finish the school. I was happy of course, that she can make it work, cause it would be a huge experience for me, studying in England, but I don't know how I'll be able to leave my family here. I really miss my parents, and my sisters even if I go somewhere for a week. What would I do if I go to England for half years?? My sister will be pregnant around this time, and I wanna be there, and see every part of her pregnancy. I wanna see how my little cousin will born. I know I am running in time, but it makes me wanna cra, if I think about leaving everything behind me. It  freaks me out. But it's 3 years away from me, so I have time to think, and find a suitable result. 


Friday, April 30, 2010

The missing grown-up thinking

This week was a quite crazy week for me, and I am not overact if I say that this was one of the wost week of my entire life. I won't talk about this, cause I don't even want to remember the things that happened to me, but it was very stressful, and I wish that I would never do that. I don't know how could I be so stupid, and irresponsible, when I thought that I am a bit more grown-up than the usual 16 years old, cause I got it a few times, but now I am a little sceptical. This was all my fault (then later it became a litle bit of my mother's too), but I did fix it, while I felt depressed in every minute of every day. Let's just say that I am so relived that I could fix this whole, complicated issue. Now I am alive again, after a really long time, and I don't want to loose my cheer. 
This affair influenced my whole family's life. They were all depressed too, they were all arguing all the time, because of me, and because of what to do in a situation like this. They never really had a calmed second, cause when they did not fight, whenever they looked at me, they saw a sad, depressed, and not-really-in-mood-for-a-good-laugh girl, who is not me, so they were kinda frightened, that it would hurt me much more than they thought. And it did. I was like a dead person, whose soul comes back to haunt the family, and makes them afraid. Still, sometimes I have to realise that this is over, cause I have this stupid feeling, which comes back all the time, not matter it is over. It really did hurt me in a deep way, and I don't wish this to anyone out there.
I know you may ask now "What the hell is she talking about?", but sorry, I can't tell you. It was just hurtful, and I wanted to share with you, how I had to do my week, thinking about the worst things that can happen to me, and stuffs like that. But let's just go ahead and talk about something else.
Yesterday I went shopping with my mom, cause I felt better, and I wanted to feel even better. I bought a hello kitty pajamas, and a pair of purple ballerina shoes. I was felt over the moon, when a telephone call just killed me inside again, and I wasn't able to do anything after the call. My mom, of course, tried to make me think of the clothes, but I knew that it's late. I was acting like a zombie during the end of our shopping day. Thank god, when we got home, we fixed the whole problem, so it will never ever hurt me. I even cooked broccoli bisk. Yummm!
And today was the graduation for the senior classes, and it was kinda exhausting, standind under the sun, in 28 degrees, I even got a headache. But it was really sad, I think at my graduation I'll be crying. 


Monday, April 26, 2010

If the laziness would hurt......

I can't tell you how big guilt I feel, thinking of my laziness through the last weeks. Let's just start that I am lacking on the posts. I literally post one or two in a week, instead like 5. And when I hardly make myself to write something, it's usually all about a big and dripping NOTHING! But it's not just about my blog, it's even my personal life. My work gets worse at the school by every day that pass, and I just feel more tired after a bad day, and after a bad day I my school work is even worse. That's how it just goes.I realised it today, when I faced with my E labeled math exam. I still don't know how it happened, cause, I admit, I was never good at math, but I never really got E ranked exams. N-E-V-E-R! So this just made me think for a little while, during some classes, and I know what's going on with me. It's April's last week, which means that I only have to bear a month at school, and that makes me feel that I have to do nothing. And there is the fact that I am at school, and living that gyratory life, where I have to take care of everything, and have to keep every little thing in my mind, since September, and if I have just a little mistake, immediately I am the wrong person. Come on! I mean we are all humans, and we gotta have some mistakes, cause nobody's perfect. 
So I was analysing myself for a long time, and I dagnostised myself with chronic tiredness. I am tired of waking up with the cocks, I am tired of not having an afternoon when I don't have to do something, I am tired of the learning, I am tired of walking to school at 7:00 AM, and I am sick of being in that situation when someone always tells me what to do or what not to do !!! It makes me mad. It makes me wanna run out of this stupid world, where I don't even know what to do with myself. I don't even know who i supposed to be, or what I supposed to do in the future. Well, who knows, maybe I will die the next day, or I will live a hundred more years, but still it's something that they should allocate during birth or something. Like you are going to be a doctor, she is going to be an actress...etc. I know I sound stupid but I just want to know sometimes that should I really take care of everything that much?!
Let's just switch the subject! I don't have school on Friday (thank god), cause it's the graduation day for the seniors. We all (juniors) have to help with the decorations, and stuffs like that, so it won't be a very stressful day. It's just such a sad day. I mean for the seniors. Cause when I was graduating from Elementary school, it was kinda a sad day for me, and High school is a bigger thing, I think. So I am just sooo thankful to have three more years. Now,  I think I start to arrange things in my life again, and I think I should start it with cleaning my room out, which looks like a battlefield. 


Sunday, April 25, 2010

My last few days....

Hi guys! So today is my sister's 20th birthday and I want to wish her a happy birthday, and I hope this year will be better for her. 
So......the health day....First we had a beautican in our class, and she told us very clever things, ans she even gave us some products, which is pretty exciting, cause for some reason I love to use new things. The next class a man came in who was showing us how dirty the water is. It was disgusting, and still I am kinda afraid to drink my water from the bottles. The last class was about eating healthy, and everyone had to do a little presentation about a fruit or a vegetable or something. I got almonds, and I remember that I even wrote down that I was suffering with it, cause I had to short it down, and thanks for my retarded brain, I left it at home, so my work was for nothing. Then we head to a spinning lesson, which was soooo much fun. We, me and Merci just beat down the guys, who are the I-am-doing-football-and-every-sport-is-a-big-crap types, and we were so proud at ourselves. :) Then on the evening, when I felt that I can't even make my eyes stay open, I went out for a concert with my sister. It was an opened place, and I have to say that I almost froze to the ground as I was waiting for the band to start. My sister recommend me to drink something, so we won't be freezing, so she bought us gin and tonic. I drank his the first time in my life, and it was actually good. But the band was even worse. I was standind there, bored by an hour, while my sister was dancing crazily. It wasn't that much fun for me, cause I would enjoy more a pop concert or something, cause they were playing rockie I think. It's not really my type. But when were about to go gome, I saw the retro stage, where they were playing Elvis. It would be better to dance to Elvis, than standind bored and watching people dancing. :)
Yesterday I met up with Merci, and we were actually watching movies, but I think we should had to go out, cause the sun was shining after a week of rain. But instead we watched Pet semetary's first half hour, cause Merci was screaming everytime, when there was a scary scene, so we decided to watch something else. I put in My sassy girl, and it was a great chioce, cause we both almost melted because of the main guy's cuteness. Then we put in While you were sleeping, but in the half of it,we turned it off and we listened to music, and ate, cause her mother cooked for us. Then I think, after a half hour I went home. I did nothing, just laying around and playing games online. It was good to do nothing. 
The time already shows 9:44am here and I should be ready for 12:00 , which means I have to wash my hair, I have to do my make-up, I have to dress up, and clean my room. I don't how, but I will be hurrying. 


PS.: Picture is from the concert! I look ridicolus, but I just wanted to put a picture here. :)

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Cavalcade of birthdays

I feel like a bottom offender. Today is my mom's birthday, and we did not have time to buy anything for her, and to be honest today this was the last thing that I was thinking about, and when I was in the middle of painting my finger nails, I got a phone call from my sister that it would be fit buying her something, and let's meet up at the mall right now. At around 6pm. I was in my sweatpants and in my hoodie, with my nails half finished, the polish almost dripped down cause it was so fresh. I could not go! And now I have a huge guilt. I know that I shall go, but I couldn't dress up or just brush my hair without blurring everything on my nails, and if they would not look that bad messed up, I would defenetely go, but ahhhh! So now I feel really bad, and I feel that I am missing everything! But I also have a few things to do today. I know that painting-my-nails-when-I-have-millions-of-errands-to-do is not too good, but after a timeless month, I thought that this evening I'll finally paint my nails to look great, for the tomorrow's concert (I'll tell you about it in a minute) and just look like a human after a really long time. But of course, exactly this afternoon seemed the best for her to go out and shop. You might think that if this day is a birthday why I am not in my best clothes, celebrating, sipping champagne, and eating cake. That's because it's a weekday, and in our family when someone's bday is in a weekday we push the celebration to the weekend. What's even funnier, my sister's bday is in Sunday!
So the concert! Tomorrow evening in a local pub there will be a concert where my sister really wants to go. I only agreed to go with her because she has noone to go with! And I had one condition, that she has to drink a few coctails with me. So I think it'll be kinda fun....I hope so!!
And tomorrow is also gonna be a tiring day, because my class, as I mentioned, will have a health day, and then we all will head to a spinning! Then I have to go home, have a shower, dress up, make-up, and everything, then go to that stupid concert thing. Then the next day is school! Perfect! I'll feel like a rag! So now, I'm going cause I have to do some other things as I mentioned before!


Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Yes!!! I am alive! After all.....

I'm so sorry that I've had gone! I just had a quite a few things to do during the weekend, and I did not have the laptop with me. But now I tell you about everything.
First of all the animal asylum was a bit strange for me. I mean I thought that I'm going to see something horrible, I mean I saw a few things, but there were one outstanding thing. The way they kept those poor dogs!! OMG! They were in a few cages, which was filled with lots of mud because of the one-week-long-raining thing. The dogs were all muddy, I just barely could pet them, because If I just touched one's head my hand looked like I did some weeding. So it was kinda embarassing how they did not care about that the dogs wallowed in their own dirt and in the mud. So I was a bit mad, and I didn't even mention how much food we brought and they did not say a ratty thank you for us. After all the way back to home was more than an hour, and I wasn't really in my travelling mood. When  I got home I was extremely tired, but I only could sleep after 10pm.
After my hectic and beneficent saturday I was at home learning. I had to leard a few things for literature because we had a huge exam on Monday. So I was kinda resting and learning. I also watched Camp Rock! :) I was full with the learning, and as I turned on my TV it caught my eye. 
On monday I did not do anything interesting I was at school and that's kinda all. I just had to go and buy bio almonds! :) It's a funny sidestory, but on Thursday we'll have a health-day at school just for my class. Almost everyone got a fruit, a vegetable or something, to make a little presentation. I got almond, so I had to go and look for bio almonds, and I did not have time to do a post. 
And so today I just made myself, but I am really tired, I have a headache, and I have to learn for English a lot, and I have no idea how I'm going to do this all, but I'll try to keep everything under my control. 
And for some reason this is the third day when people say that my make-up is heavy. The first time I had blue eye shadow on, yesterday green, and they were all saying that I only need a mini skirt to be a b**** and today I only did a neutral eye look, and now the teacher told me too. I thought that I'll go crazy. I think tomorrow I won't have make-up on. I don't know what's wrong with people!


Friday, April 16, 2010

Visiting an animal asylum

Hi people! It's Friday finally. This week had gone really fast, I didn't even realise how the days spent. I was just doing my everyday things, and the days passed like hours. It's really weird. But....I am a bit disappointed even though it's weekend! Tomorrow I have to wake up really early, just like in my usual weekdays. And the reason why I can't sleep as much as I should on a Saturday morning is that we are visiting an animal asylum with my class, and we have to meet up at 8.30am. What an idea! They are expecting us at 10.00am and the way to that place is really long. And of course we are meeting up earlier to make sure to reach the bus.
I am looking forward to it, each person can chose a dog, and this dog will stay with us all day. We have to walk, feed, and wash our dogs, and then I think clean their places. The only thing I am very afraid of is to see something that I don't want to! You know there are crazy people who can hurt to an animal, and I can't watch this. I can't bear if an animal has scars or something like that. I mean those really huge scarves. I brake into tears, or I have to go out of the room. I don't know what to expect. 
And I am of course a bit worrying about the dogs attitude. I hope they like humans, and won't bite my hands off. And for all of your surprise I am also afraid of that I won't be able to normally take care of a dog. I never had a dog, so I don't really know how to walk a dog, or how to wash one. I think it will be interesting watching me suffering with them. I think it will equal with a movie. 
Tomorrow I'll let you know what happened, cause I think I'll have a lot to say. Say a prayer for me! :)

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Review: The last song

I've just finished The last song yesterday!
As you might realised, I don't really do reviews on books, because I read a lot, and it would be so boring for you to read it all the time. But I have to say that I had a book like that in my hands a while ago, I didn't even do my make up for two days, so I could read in the morning too. It made me laugh and cry, it made me feel sad but even made me way too happy, I felt fear and shame, and by the end it became a huge experience, so I decided to tell you what I think about it. As I read the first pages I immediately recognize myself in Ronnie's character and it made it a lot funnier. I am not talking about the outside, more about the inside. I always caught myself to think that I would do the exact same thing as Ronnie. And the way she revolts all the time. It was really cool to read about a girl who is kinda the same as me.

"Truth only means something when it's hard to admit." 

As I reached the part when she meets Will all the time, I was about to melt away, because of the cuteness as he wrote down the story. I wanted to feel the same love as they feel, and still I would be sooo happy to feel something like that. It was just amazing how briskly the emotions showed page by page. I could feel the same as the character. Fear, anger, love, happiness then sadness and way more feelings that I can't even write down. 

"Sometimes you have to be a part from people you love, but that doesn't make you love them any less. Sometimes you love them more." "

But as I got to the middle of the book, something happened that made feel sad. (Spoiler!!!) When she found out that his dad has cancer I felt sooo bad, and I had to read through how he died. I don't want my dad to be the same. It wasn't a really great part, just because I always thought that it can happen to me in every minutes as the time passes. I mean I hope it won't, and I hope that our story won't end like this. 

"Love is Fragile and Sometimes were Not The Best Caretakers."

So I just wanted to say that this book was quite special for me in a lot of ways. I think I would read it again and again and again. I ONLY can recommend it to every romantic girl, who needs a little happiness or just an unforgettable book to read, and maybe for guys too, but I am not sure about them.
It think it was the writer's best work far away. So by this way I wanted to say a huge thank you to Nicholas Sparks who made it possible to read something like that, and to coungratulate to this amazing story. I promise that it will always have the best place on my bookshelf. So again, Thank you sooooo much!


Sunday, April 11, 2010

A heavenly party on saturday

Let's just start from the beggining! On Friday I went shopping for presents as I mentioned. I bought a beautiful purple shirt, and a cute earring with bows to the bday girl. And also a birthday card. And of course I couldn't leave without The last song, so I bought the book, and I was way too happy. I also bought myself a pair of earrings, which one says hate and the other love. It looks soooo cool. I weared it yestreday, and I got a lot of questions about them. 
Sooooooo yesterday! As you might know I went to one of my girlfriend's birthday party, which was held at her house. She lives like 20 minutes away from me by car, but still not in the same city as me. Because we don't have licence we all decided to go together, so we met up at 1:45pm yesterday, and went with a bus. When we arrived after 30 minutes I saw my dreamhouse. Her (parents') house is PINK! I was like OMG! As we passed through the garden I saw her dog too, which is a huge golden retriever. She was as big as two of me. And his name is Arthur. He was way too cute, and during the day, we went out to play with her like a million times. Actually he was playing with socks, and we always stole it from him, so he started chasing us all the time. So yeah we really cute. 
Then she showed us the whole house, which is pretty cool, cause there were a bunch of balloons saying happy birthday. And I think I liked the bathroom the most. It's soooo beautiful. Then we just sat down in the living room, where were the DJ, and the food. Actually the guys went upstairs to play card games, so we girls played some stupid games, like musical chairs. It's a game which I last played in kindergarden. It's all about that for example 10 people are playing, and we carry 9 chairs into the room. As the music goes we have to go around the chairs, and when someone suddenly stops the music everyone have to sit down, and the one who couldn't find a seat is out of the game. And you play this till all the people fall out, and have one winner. But I'm pretty sure that everyone knows this game, so I just tell you about the other.
It is a stupid game too. We filled two bowles with smarties, and brought a pack of sippers. Two people had to play at the same time, and the challenge was that, you had to transfer as many smarties to an another bowl with a sipper as many you could in 30 seconds. I lose all the time, but I wasn't sad at all. :) But my friends took videos of everyone who tried it out, and it was kinda embarassing. 
Then we had a kind of dinner which was amazing. There were a bunch of meat cooked in hundreds of different ways, or you could chose ham rolls. You could also chose the garnish. There were mozarella salad (which is my absolute favourite), potatoe salad, corn salad, french salad, paste salad...etc. We ate soooooo much, and after the meal, we had a little preview of the bday girl's dancing skills. She is dancing for almost 4 years, and she is doing it beautifully. Then we had the cake, which was zacher cake (my favourite again) and then we went upstairs, talking, playing games, and just laughing. But there were and another amazing thing in this party. Chocolate fountain!!!! It was on the middle of the desk, and around it there were 5 different types of fruits, and you could chose what you wanted to put under the fountain. I have to say that the pineapple, and the kiwi was wonderful with chocolate. I felt I'm going to explode cause of the sooo much food, but I think it worth it. I arrived home at around 9:15pm, cause my dad took me home. All I could do is have a shower, then I fall into my bed. 
Because this post is already really long, I'm not gonna start into a nwe story, but I have to tell that the yesterday's party was amazing, and incredible. I laughed a lot, and talked to people who I never really used to. We were all so loose, and just had a great time hanging with each other. I hope that I'll be on the guest list. And again happy birthday to YOU!


Thursday, April 8, 2010

The house's curse

Sadly I have to tell you a very sad story today, but I promise it will turn out good a few paragraphs later. So you have to know that like a year ago, our neighboors were an older married couple, and we just got to know that the man has cancer for years. Of course it hit us well, cause we were in a kind of friendship with them. They were really nice, and always helpful. But as the time passed the man couldn't even get up, or just simply walk. A few months later, he died. I had to see how they are bringing him out of his home, and of course her wife was way too sad. After a month his death she moved out, and a new married couple took over their one-time house. We didn't really got to know them, but to be honest we didn't really liked them, because they were very loud, and just unkind with people (and I say it by my own experiences, not just judging). But I never wished anything bad for them. But I just found out today that the wife died in cancer on Monday. They had to keep it in a big secret, because no one knew anything since today. I couldn't believe my ears. and of course itt fills me with fear, because of my father. As you know I told you about him before, and I don't really like to talk about this at all. But you know he has cancer too for years now, and I don't likw to hear about these deaths all around me, cause it creeps me out. So the point of this whole thing, is that I want to proclaim my biggest solidarity againts the husband. Simply, I just feel so sorry, and I hope that everything is going to be alright. 
And also a weird thing had happened to me today. Me and Merci were walking home from school, and we almost reached our street when a kind of a homeless family got in our way. There was a child, a mother, and a grandma. As we slowly reached the old woman she asked us if we have any money to give them. I saw that they weren't as sensible as they should be, so I said no, but I had money with in my wallett, but to be honest I don't like to give money to these kind of people who buy alcohol on it. So as we said no, this old woman literally started yelling at us whit her muddy voice. I got sceared to be honest, because as were walking I heard that she speeded up her steps to reach us, while she was still yelling in the middle of the street. I was just dumbfounded. But we also speeded a bit and we just gave up chasing us, cause I think she realised that no matter how much she will srugglem she won't ever reach us. We couldn't even talk cause of the amazement. What the hell is wrong with people these days?
But my yesterday was actually really good. When my older sister came home from work, we decided to go and have ice-cream and just walk a little. So we went out joined by my other sister too. We had huge ice-creams and I couldn't eat anymore this evening. We spent the rest of the evening sitting on a bench in a nice park near our house. We were just talking and stuffs like that. We never really have time to go out just the three of us. This afternoon I think I'm going running, but that's not sure. And tomorrow I have to go shopping for presents, cause on Saturday I'm going to one of my girlfriend's bday party. I don't know how I'm going to make it, cause I'm going with my mom, and she will arrive home at around 6pm. So It's going to be a fast shopping spree. 


Monday, April 5, 2010

A quick status report

I smell like a quite hampered perfumes' mix...and I already had showered. I hate when the guys spray these nauseously sweet scents on my hair, my dress and even on my skin. I could more appreciate water, to be honest. But I don't live in the countryside, and this tradition is kinda a little bit more typical there. These sissy, urban guys use these horrible patchoulis. :D And these times after I wash my hair, I still can smell the scents for days. Now I just put all my clothes which I weared today to the laundry, and I just hope to get them back without THE smell. Besides I had to listen to hundreds of poems, while I shall do something more meaningful. Like translating Gulliver's travels, or writing an english essay, or just rest a little bit. But the afternoon actually turned out very well, since I could prove to my sister's new boyfriend that I am not a total idiot, and actually I even made him laugh a few times with my sarcasm, which became my personality's part as the time passed, and now I don't even realise when I say something sarcastic. Actually my mom takes it as an insult sometimes, and it's kinda weird.
And now finally Jane Eyre started. I was waiting for it, I wanted to watch this movie a lot, before I read it. I know that from this the post is going to be meaningless. I am listening to it, and watching with my eyes attached to the screen. It looks good, and it really interest me. I hope I can watch it without falling asleep. 
So I just wanted to let you know how I am smelling, and I think I will for a couple of more days. :) I hope you all had as many easter-sprinkler-guys as you wanted. I hope you had wonderful easters with your family and friends. 


Sunday, April 4, 2010

A sweet surprise in the corner

First of all! Happy Easter to all you of you who are celebrating it.  
This morning I was up early, at around 7am and I decided to finish pride and prejudice, which was amazing casually, and after I made myself to go to the bathroom. When I met my mom at the kitchen she was smiling at me wildly, and I couldn't take it anywhere. She didn't really used to be that happy in the mornings, but I didn't ask, she was just mentioning some eggs, but I couldn't really understand her, so I just sit down to eat breakfast with my family, because I was starving. The meal was of course ham and eggs. When I finished it, and went to my room,I undestood why mom was that weird this morning. I shall notice the chocolate eggs laying on the floor next to my door. I started to laugh at myself, and so my mom. Later this afternoon I promised to help her with the cooking, or beaking...I don't remember which one....:)
Now I am sitting on my bed, cuddlep up with a bunch of pillows, and just thinking. I still have no idea why I don't do anything during this weekend. Of course it's a feast and just several places are open, and If I would search I could find a bunch of things to do for school, but I am way too lazy after 7 months of hard work, which sometimes didn't even showed up. Leaving March behind me, I realised how tired I am, and how I can't concentrate at school anymore. In my classes all I do is yawning and suffering conspicuously and sometimes when the tiredness abates a bit, I only can think of the summer time, which is coming unstoppably. A few days ago, the day was sunny and warm, so I decided to go out and do there a blog post, or just talk with my friends, and so I went outside, and after a long attempt to arrange the chair to be like the-sun-is-not-bliding-me-but-still-will-have-a-good-tan arrange, I sat down and turned on my laptop. The main problem was that I couldn't see the screen in the sunlight, so I had to gave up this idea. Then I thought that I still can sunbathing but the wind strarted to blow, and it almost froze my hands to the chair as I was gripping it in the cold surprise. So after 5 minutes of arranging, sunbathing and freezing I decided to go inside, and stay in my room, and I was beguiling myself that in my spring break from school, I'll sit outside, tanning, and reading, but still it doesn't seem to come true. Yesterday was sunny, but not warm, and today the sun went on holiday too. I am waiting for a miracle, or just a little hope to find something good in my remainder break. Anyways, Happy Easter again! 


Friday, April 2, 2010

Bad joke or a sour woman?

Well, in not a lot of, but in some of the situations I am right! Let's just say that the turkish guy only wanted to have FUN with Merci, and he didn't have any purpose to make a relationship with her, which wasn't surprising for me. When she called me, that the guy blocked in his thoughts about them, she was very dissapointed. She couldn't believe it, and she kinda sill wanted to talk with him after all these. I just awared her, that this guy is just like a lot of others. He has nothing special, and he is even a jerk. Now, I think after 3 or 4 days she is in a better mood then she was in when they were "talking". That obvious afternoon I didn't tell her that "I told you"! I didn't want to hurt her feelings, I only told her that we couldn't expect much better. But yestreday I just spilled out these three hurting words: I told you! She looked at me, she wasn't smiling, she wasn't mad....she was just unloving. She said that I am right! I didn't want to hear this from her. It semmed like she feels sorry for it, I mean it seemed like she feels ashamed in front of me, which I never wanted! We were always our other halves, and we were never like that with each other. She doesn't have to feel aynthing like that when she is talking to me. I didn't tell her because I wasn't sure what I saw, but I think it was something like that. 
Now, we have our spring break, and I am about to meet her. We are gonna watch new moon I think...again :). We saw it once a while ago, maybe at november or something. So now I have the DVD and I go to her place to watch it, and just comfort her a little. But before this I have to meet her in our local-market-place, because she has to buy something for her cats....I'm waiting for her call, actually, and I have to pick up my bag and some clothes, and go. She went training this morning, and she is still there...I don't know...So this whole thing's point was that I knew it from the beggining that he has to be kidding with her with this LOVE thing. But she wasn't really listening to me. Well, how Jane Austen said "Before marriage, we gotta have some unfulfilled loves". I think she might be right. But it's just hurts sometimes....
I know that yesterday was april's fools day. I shall write something stupid here and thn spill that it was only a joke or something. But I was lazy, and at 6 pm me and my sister decided to go out shopping. Ok, it's actually funny, because we she wanted to go running, but I wanted to go skating. Then she said Ok, let's go skating and we even dress up and everything when I just realised that one pair of skates are missing. I kew that my other sister lended it to someone months ago, and I became really agnry. But then we decided in our unexciting hours to go shopping for a near mall. So we jumped in the car and went out for the evening. I almost bought the Last Song, but I realised that I don't have any money with me, and I didn't want to ask from my sister. So the only joke we made was at school. We switched classrooms with a class, and we were expecting the other class' teacher, when our teacher stepped in the room. She didn't seem to get the joke, moreover she was sourer than she usually used to be if it's even possible. So it didn't turn out like laughning all day, it was just like a normal day. So now I got the call, and I have to go!


Monday, March 29, 2010

Foreign guys, just like Rob Pattinson

Well, I am that dumbfounded that I don't even know where to start! It's all about Merci! She met a guy on facebook, who lives in Turkey. This was 3 days ago. On Saturday they started talking via webcams because some of our girlfriends were there. On Sunday this guy told her that his totally in love with her!!!!!! I was like what?! while all of the girls in my class were melting! I looked like I am way jealous, because I wasn't really fainting from him, and so on....And still to this moment this is poking me. I don't think that a guy who lives miles away from here and not even speak the same language could fall in love with a girl in 2 days. I mean they CAN'T even fall in love, because they try to speak in english but their vocabularies only mean like four of five words: hi, honey, love, yes, no! This is kinda all that they can say to each other, because he can't speak english...not even hungarian. So I don't know, maybe there's something wrong with me, but I still think that he is making fool of her, and to be honest I don't want my best friend, to be a sad, and broken hearted girl, because of someone who doesn't even deserve her attention. I told her my opinion this afternoon, and she said that she doesn't even believe in him, but I gosh, I can see it in her, that she's tottaly into him, and she expects something from this whole thing! I am worried about her! I am afraid that she'll hurt, very much....They say that she needs my advices, but I can't say better than ask him that actually what the hell does he want from her?!! She doesn't want to ask this...Maybe it's this self-delusion from her, but I don't know what to think, and what to say to her! Please!!!!!! Give me advices, and tell me your opinions!!!! I need help! Am I too awaring??? Or Am I right? And what  more should I tell her?
Then OMG!!! I was just sitting here, in my bed, and I was doing this blog post, and my tv was on. I wasn't listening to it, but one name hit my ears. ROBERT PATTINSON!!!! He is in my place, in Hungary and filming a movie!!!! I can't even believe that he is like only 20 kilometres away from me, and he is walking around on the same path where I used to every single day. A lot of girls are chasing him around, and of course I would like to see him, but I don't think that I'll run after him if he cathes my eyes somewhere. So right now I don't think that I'll get any sleep later this evenig. 


Saturday, March 27, 2010

One day can mean mourning and feast

Happy name day to myslef!!! :D:D ( )
Here we are again! The day when we are mourning instead of the party that we should throw. We would absolutely have a lot of people here, cause I, of course, would invite all of my friends, and I think we would spend the day amazingly. But this is the day when my grandma died, exactly eighteen years ago. I didn't know her, and of course she didn't know me either. I bornt 2 years after her death. When my parents chose my name, didn't know which day is it, but when they realised it, they didn't want to change it. These days my grandpa always in deep sadness, and he just sticks it to other people too. This morning he was the first who wished me to have this day houndred times more in my life, and he seemed happy....but then we had breakfast he just looked really sad. I wanted to hug and comfort him, but then I rather chose to stay in the background. I think he is a bit made for himself. He doesn't really like when someone take care of him. He doesn't like to show that he is old, he doesn't even let anybody to do anything instead of him. He usually does the washing up, sometimes he cleans the house, makes my bed....and whenever we try to dissuade him to do these things, he just pisses off. So I rather let him to do it, just like now, mourning deep inside of himself. He maybe feels better because he does this thing. I mean he didn't have any women in his life since grandma died. He really loved her. But she is dead for 18 years now. Which is really-really heart-breaking. So today when me and my mom were about to go to buy some things in a mall, just mentioned me grandma. She misses her so much, and she said that sometimes when she can't sleep, she often thinks of her. I almost cried....
And now, to make this post a little bit I was writing here, a man just started to play in an accordion while he was walking around the houses, and my grandpa just gave gim money to stand under my window and play for me. I was shocked. :D He was smiling at me, and playing. Actually he did it very well, but I have no idea who was this person....I never saw him, or anyone walking around and playing in an accordion. But it was way tooooo sweet from my grandpa. I love him!! :) I think this was the sweetest present for me. 
And to talk about the present and make this a little bit of haul blog post I tell you what I got from my parents. I got a leather pink, and purple huge wallet with flowers on it. And it looks adorable. Then I got pride and prejudice for my name it wasn't a suprise. Then I also got some money, and I think that's all...Now, I'm going because I think I'll help my mom cooking. I am starving....:)


Friday, March 26, 2010

It means just an another year

Why do people make such a big deal about a name day? I don't know how many countries celebrate name days, but I think some people might overreact it. Ok, I really do love to get presents this day, but all I have to say that this whole thing only means that an another year passed again over us, and sometimes this year seems only a month or a week...I clearly can remember what I exactly did a year and a day ago.  I was celebrating with Merci, at my place, and we were after a hard school day, on Friday. We ordered pizza, and just talked for hours. My parents didn't really make a big deal about that, and I don't even remember what I get. From Merci, I know that I got hair curlers, and I got Zac Efron socks....:D I was a huge fan a year ago....still I haven't really weared it, and to be honest I don't really want looks sooooo cool. So it was my last years celebration, and I remember that when I was a child I only got flowers and chocolate, but now many people stress a lot on my presents. Wouldn't it be so easy to give me a bouquet of flowers? I would feel really honored, because I really love flowers...but they just want to buy something permanent. And this morning I was surprised when I saw a huge Betty Boop paperbag in my best friend's hand. I instantly got the whole thing, she didn't really have to say "Happy name day" or something....I was way too pleasured that I got a Betty Boop bag, and I had to admire it for like 5 minutes before looking inside. I got Jane Austen's Persuation, which I haven't read before, but I heard that it's a great book. Then I just got a Betty Boop mirror, which looks extremely cute!!!! I was in amazement. Then I got a Betty Boop keychain too, and little envilop with a card in it. It says happy name day to the bestest friend. Awwww! :) So my day just tured out pretty well, confuting my early morning feelings, that the life is not made for me this day.
Tomorrow you won't guess who's coming around....yes, my sister's boyfriend. I think he only comes here, because he knows how much jealousy I feel for the happy couples...:) But let's just face it, they ARE happy, and this is sooo unfair. But I am, of course, happy for them. I am sooo corious that he will say anything to me or not...:D Cause my name day is actually on Saturday, but I got the present from Merci today, cause she won't be able to give it to me tomorrow. So I am just corious....
Then I just want to buy Nicholas Sparks's Last song, which only comes out on the last day of March here. I just need to finish two books before I buy it....:S I hope there will be more when I got there, because in the front cover of the book, there is Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth. I think it's the movie poster, but I am not sure. 


PS.: The picture is the cover of the book.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Is the spring better with a guy?

Will this really last forever? 
I didn't really got an answer for this question since I used to ask this from myself as long as I became a tenager. These days the spring finally reached my little town, with its sunshine, and warmth. And now, all I can see is cuddling couples walking side by side and hand in hand in the warm wind, while they seem to really enjoy each other's company. I could deduce it from their cracking kisses, and tinkling laughters which they share in every minute. I think only one thing can mess these couples cloudless happiness, and this thing is my envious look, and my disturbing shoe with a squelchy sole because of my drool dripping out of my mouth straight to the ground as I look at them. Well that's not that idyllic, but they have to bear me....if I bear them too. So the pont is that I want my smart, funny, and intelligent other half of me to finally find me. Am I asking for too much? Or maybe am I asking something impossible? Ok, I don't say that I seriously need a guy or something, but it's so hartbreaking to see those so-much-in-love couples walking around, and leaving jealousy in the single girl's heart. Even in my school my friends are seem to make new relationships, while they can only see my sour expression instead of my support. But when I feel that I suffered enough, I just reposing myself with a stupid but simple thing. While they became more and more in love I just learn even more at home, and I become smarter and smarter. I only say that because you won't ever guess what happened today!! I just got a B for my physics essay! Which is a miracle in my life...:) The teacher even told me that she is proud of me. I was about to stand up, and dance through the classroom, but then I just softly smiled at the teacher. 
As I mentioned my sister's boyfriend visited us for th first time, and I have to say that he is really cute, and a thousand times better than her old boyfriend. He looks smart and intelligent with his bright blue eyes, and he seems to be in a really good mood, because he is always smiling or laughing at something. I think that I don't have to mention that he is super funny too....I think some bad luck follows me or smething. Why can't I just find a guy like him? I mean of course I make a fool of me in front of guys like them....when he just introduced himself to me I only could say a shy hello, and that was all. Later when they asked me what's wrong I just humbled myslef and used the always believable excue: I am just tired! So it was kinda embarassing...Now I have to go! Have a nice day!


Saturday, March 20, 2010

Introduction, books, and lating, all in one

Gosh! I'm just flustering out of my pants....My sister's boyfriend coming around for the first time ever, and I just don't know how to act, how to say hi, or even just how to dress up. I had never been good in meeting new people, because I am way too nervous, and I don't know what to say, and my face turns crab red and they think that I'm a total idiot. But I just have this problem....well I think I should go and see a doctor...So today I was cleaning my room, arranging everything and just stuffs like that. Before, in the morning I just went out to a mall, bacuse I had to buy an another oxford bookworms book...which I have to read until April. It's Gulliver's travels. So I won't be bored.
And today I just talked with an old friend of mine again, after a really really long time. And it made me happy. Ohhh! I almost just forget about that. I finally made myself to buy  pride and prejudice, because I just love the 6 hours long movie, but I haven't really read it before. So now I can just adoring it. :) Also, yesterday evening was just way too funny. To understand the whole thing I tell you  a few things before I start the story.

1.: My sister is working as you know, and she has her own car and everything, but she has a really good friend at her workplace and this friend always picks her up, and takes her to the office too.

2.: My sister is never on time. No matter how much earlier she wakes up, it's just her. We just used to it, because we are sisters, but sometimes, I just got  mad too, when we have to arrive somewhere. So, her friend is ALWAYS waiting in the car every single morning, and they both arrive later. Until yesterday...:)

Because her friend just left her here....:) I think he (because this friend is a he) just got enough of the eternal waiting, and nicked off. Well, we weren't blaming him or everything but yesterday evening we were laughning on him a lot. He acts childishly, because he is now mad at my sister, because he didn't go down in time. But come on. He should be malevolent or something....they talked about before, and my sister clearly told him, that he can go if she lates, and now he did it, and he pissed off. Cool! So we were laughing a lot in this situation, and now I am just nervous....he will be here in 3 hours I think...Well, I hope I won't make a fool of myself. Wish me all the best, please!!! :)
What do you think, how I should act? Or when I hear that they arrive, should I go out of my room, or wait till they just come to my room??