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Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Gonna get a gun and shoot myself....

Hi everyone!
I'm greeting every single person in this wonderful, shiny day which means the beggining of the spring. I'm sooo happy, but I heard that the next week is going to snowing, so I'm a bit sad, but right now it's March, which is pretty good. Since I have my name day this month, on the 27th, and we have my sister's bday party on the 17th it's gonna be a really good month. I mean I don't really have any plans or something, but I hope that my name day will be a really warm day, with a lots of sunhine. I mean the 27th day of March was always sunny and warm as I can remember. We weren't living here when I was a child, and I can remember that the sun was always shining trough the window. So back there...nowadays I don't see these days that happy and cloudless. But let's hope this year will bring me something new. 
Also as I mentioned, my sister turning 24 this month which is really scary. I mean I got stucked when she was 20. I can't believe it....She's planning the moving, and stuffs like that, which is scary too....I never really thought about this before, and this is just freaking me out. Like never really see my sister only in the weekends like twice in a month?! Gosh!
And the other thing! I'm extremely depressed these days, and of course the reason is that PERSON! I told you before in the last post, and I don't really want to say anything, just that SHE makes my life impossible. I don't really know how I'll survive this. We only live together for 3 days but I almost killed myself a few times. Gosh, and it seems that she's not staying a month....it seems like she stays 2!!!!!!! What the hell I'll do? I'm really in a huge depression! I don't have a place where I can be on my own, and this is killing me. I need to be alone at home. I mean when I want to be with someboby I go to that person's room, but not now as it seems. The main thing which makes me really mad, is that she doesn't get that I have to go to school really early, and I have to go to sleep at 10 at least. But no, she doesn't go to school of course, so she is in front of the computer all evening and banging the keyboard which hurts my ears. And the one thing which is even worse, she is talkig to her friends, but they were together all day long. I'm gonna go crazy, and I don't know what should I do, to survive this month, then she'll go home a little bit, for a couple days, but then she is gonna get back again! I'm gonna bet sick If I'm gonna do this the whole month. Oh and the other thing, I almost have to fight to get here....It's ridiculous!!
Ok, I don't wanna look like that I'm just complaining here, but Merci is stupid nowadays too. Right now she is talking to an another girlfriend of our, and she doesn't tell me what's the problem, just to that girl! That's so sweet from her! :S I'm so mad at her these times. 

XOXO, LD

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