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Friday, March 12, 2010

An inexplicable, and strange feeling

This is ridiculous what had happened to me today!  
Let's just mention that I have an excuse to my behavior, because it's Friday, which is the last working day of the week, and it means, that I woke up super early for five days, and on the fifth, I feel  like a rag. That's how happened this with me today.
Merci asked me sleep at her place because her mother gets home really late, and his father is out of town, so she didn't want to be alone. I wasn't that sure, but I said yes, and we also set that we are going to shopping this afternoon, because we had to buy presents, which we didn't find at least, but we ate at KFC and we bought books. Actually we had a really great time together, but when we were going home I already felt that I am really-really tired. When you're eyes closing by themselfves, and you just don't notice anything around you. Well that was with me. Then when I got home, I had to collect all of my energy to have a shower, and make my way to Merci's place. And there is where the problem begins. 
I just entered the house, and some strange, but not really unknown feeling had gone through me. I had that huge panic, and all I wanted was to go home. I have no idea what happened to me that moment, but then I just acted really weird. Merci could not make a simple converstation with me, and whenever she asked me what's the problem, I just said that I'm tired! But there was something else too! I know. I felt it! Something really bad in my stomach. I mean a bad feeling. I almost cry. OMG! I was like a five years old girl, who wants to go home, or wants an ice cream really badly. I knew that I have to go home, cause if I'm not I'm gonna do something. Then I just told her that I hope she won't be mad at me, bu I think I'll go home, and stuffs like that! She said that nothing happened, but I know that she wasn't happy. I know her well enough.
Well I am at home right now, and I feel way better. I am extremely tired, but happy to be at home, in my own room, my own bed and I'm about to start the new book I bought. Still to this moment I don't know what happened to me, and I feel really ashamed because I didn't want to hurt Merci's feelings that much, but to be honest, in that moment mines were much more important.

XOXO, LD

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